Las Vegas is the known as not only the Entertainment Capital of the World, but also the Wedding Capital of the World. Over 120,000 couples now flock there every year to say I do. There are many reasons so many couples choose to take the plunge in this glitz and glamour city. Let’s examine some of them:
1. Where else can you get the exciting wedding options that Las Vegas has to offer? The wedding packages Las Vegas offer are vast and unusual and many of them can’t be found anywhere else. Drive thru wedding chapels, Elvis ceremonies, and a wide variety of themed wedding packages are just some of the unique wedding opportunities you will find if you choose to say I do in Las Vegas.
2. The ease of obtaining a marriage license is a big draw for many couples. There are no blood tests and no waiting periods making it easy to be spontaneous. You can wake up one morning and decide you want to get married, hop a flight to Vegas, and be married by that evening.
3. No time consuming wedding planning. Chapels all over the city offer pre arranged wedding packages that include everything you need for your wedding. This takes the stress out of having to plan your nuptials. No having to coordinate the minister, site, photographer, florist, etc. They do it all for you. The biggest decisions you will have to make is deciding which Las Vegas chapel or location to wed at and then choosing the wedding date, time, and package that you want. The wedding coordinators at the location you choose will help you with the rest.
4. It can be very inexpensive. A marriage license costs $55 and a no frills Vegas wedding package starts at about $40 (not including the minister fee) so you can easily say I do for around $200. Figure in the cost of airfare and other travel costs and you can still get by with spending between $1000-2000 which is well below the average cost of a wedding which is now somewhere between $20,000-30,000.
5. After the wedding is over, you can take advantage of the fact that you are in one of the most exciting cities in the world and enjoy some of the wonderful entertainment and attractions that Las Vegas has to offer.
So if you are contemplating Vegas nuptials, know that you can have an easy, affordable, and exciting wedding ceremony if you decide to say your vows in the Wedding Capital of World.
Rebecca Johnson is owner of the Las Vegas Wedding Informer, a website that provides Las Vegas wedding planning information. Visit is to learn more about Las Vegas wedding chapels and Vegas wedding packages.
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The guy has finally popped the question and the big day is almost here. Everything is in place except for hiring someone to take the wedding photos. You want great wedding pictures, but you don’t have a lot of money. What can you do to save money and still get great wedding photos? If you go too cheap on your wedding photography it will be obvious. Keep in mind that this is the day you have been waiting for your entire life, and you will want to remember it forever. If you follow a few simple ideas you can still get great wedding photos and save money.
The first thing is to get a professional wedding photographer. There is only one chance to get these pictures right. Becky Jenkins wanted to get the best Athens, Georgia wedding photographer she could find, but her uncle offered to do the pictures for free. He had been dabbling in photography and seemed to take good pictures. When she finally got the pictures back they were either too dark or over exposed. Becky was devastated, but there was nothing she could do at that point. You can cut corners in a lot of areas, but if you go cheap on your photos you have to be very careful. You can find professional wedding photographers with packages in every price range – including yours.
A popular trick for getting good candid shots is to place disposable cameras on each table. This is a fun way to get good pictures for cheap, and to get pictures that the wedding photographer would miss. The problem with disposable cameras at weddings is that two or three dozen rolls of film are very expensive to develop. Instead of putting them on the table, maybe just hand them out to select people at the wedding.
Another way to save money is to be selective with what pictures you want. Maybe you are fine with only a few professional pictures being taken at your wedding reception. If you use the disposable cameras as mentioned above you won’t need as many professional photographs and this can save you money. Decide early what is most important to you and make sure the wedding photographer gets only those pictures. Quality is better than quantity.
There are so many ways to save money on your wedding and still throw an event that everyone will remember forever. With a little ingenuity you can save thousands and still have a wedding that looks like a million bucks. Your wedding day is one of the most important days of your life and when it comes down to it the only thing that’s important is that you are marrying the person you love.
The author Rhonda Thompson is a professional photographer in the Athens and northeast Georgia area specializing in wedding, family, portrait, and pet photography. You can view her photography at http://www.RhondaThompson.com
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Let’s think of love not as a word but an action. Instead of saying “I love you.” Show you wife that you love her. Be more loving! How can a man show his woman he loves her? By doing!
Forget about the box of chocolates and flowers. Any man can go buy these things. But any man cannot show love to his wife on a whim. The chocolates get eaten and make your wife fat and cranky; the flowers wither and die in three days. What about showing your love by doing things that you know your wife will enjoy?
~How Should A Husband Love His Wife~
When was the last time you wined and dined your wife? What about a mini-vacation? Are you the romantic type? If not find out how you can amaze your wife by being a romantic guy. What would that involve?
A woman likes a man who can cook. How about cooking her an intimate candlelit dinner for two? Don’t know how to cook? Get a cookbook and do it anyway. Have some fun in the kitchen and enjoy yourself.
Don’t forget, you wife likes to be touched and hugged without the pressure of sex looming in the near future. Sometimes the hugging and coddling is more important to her than the actual sex act. Not that she doesn’t like to orgasm but that she wants to KNOW that you love her more than the sex act itself. Hug her and cuddle her and you’ll most likely get what you want later.
The most important way to show your love is through your acceptance and validation. Are you the kind of guy that discounts his wife’s choices, desires, and needs through invalidation? This kind of behavior will cause all kinds of trouble in the marriage. Let me tell you why.
By invalidating your wife in whatever manner, you have essentially rejected her. She will feel as if her opinions, decisions, and beliefs don’t count and shouldn’t be regarded with importance. She will hold this within her consciousness and it will come back to haunt you later on in the marriage. This won’t be on purpose but mostly because you have hurt her. She loves you and when you invalidate her feelings, thoughts, actions, beliefs, views, and opinions, she gets hurt!
Let me tell you a big secret about woman, which also includes your wife. Your wife may ask you for your opinion on something because it is in her nature to get a second opinion but that does not necessarily mean that she will go with your opinion or your opposing viewpoint.
I’m not talking about the submission thing here either. What I’m talking about is just everyday thoughts and actions of your wife. If for some reason you really feel that it is best that you disagree with her thoughts and feelings, do so AFTER you have said something positive about the way she thinks and feels. Be understanding! If you actually validate her she will see it your way on her own, even if she won’t admit it.
Your wife may also like to vent her feelings more then you, not because she needs for you to find a solution so much as just being a sounding board. Give her validation in what she has to say, and then ask her if she is looking for an opinion and or solution first before giving her one. This doesn’t make much sense to you, but to us women it makes a lot of sense.
~How A Wife Should Love Her Husband~
It is my firm belief that it is easier to make a man happy than for a man to make a woman happy. I believe this because men really don’t ask for much. If they can camp out on the hard ground with the ants and other bugs how hard can they be to please? Yes, I know this sounds superficial but think about this for a moment. Have you noticed how much happier, and less stressed out your man is when he has his two most important needs met, sex and food?
It is also semi-true that the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach. They love to eat and they love to eat good tasty meals. When their stomachs are full, and they have been taken care of physically, a man doesn’t ask for much else.
Don’t forget, the home is a man’s castle. Knowing this, make every effort to keep his castle tidy and free of stressful situations that could upset his equilibrium. He has worked all day long and wants to come home to a loving and sweet wife, not a grouch and a TV dinner
Be appreciative of every little thing your man does around the house. Make your man feel like a man by being a woman. Give him a hug and a kiss where it counts, talk about your day together. Don’t reject your husband sexually. Make him feel good about himself by telling him so. Respect him for who he is and what he does!
Basically, a woman needs validated and intimacy, and a man needs sex and good food. Find ways in which you can give of your self in the marriage by being more loving in these areas.
And men, after you have shown your wife how much you love her, then you can buy her the chocolates and flowers.
Angie Lewis offers spiritual enlightenment tips for couples in marriage, and is the author of new release book JOURNEY ON THE ROADS LESS TRAVELED. This unique book is about love, life, marriage, addiction, temptation, and understanding the power of spiritual awareness for your marriage. In her book, Angie reveals her own journey of overcoming addiction and battling with her negative emotions that she allowed to embrace her life and marriage.
To find out more about this new book click here, http://www.spiritual.journeybooks.4t.com/
ISBN 1413788904
Avaliable Amazon online!
Angie Lewis counsels couples and writes a monthly newsletter where she reveals her secrets on how YOU can stay happily married for life! Subscribe to get your FREE monthly newsletter so you can stay happily and forever married!
http://www.heavenministries.com/
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GONE are the days when the second time bride known as the “encore bride” has to settle for scaled down ceremonies with fewer guests.
With over 45% percent of all weddings today involving one or both partners who have been married before, it’s difficult to tell from the attire whether the modern bride is marrying for the first or umpteenth time. In fact, the modern bride who is lucky enough to find love again is trampling on the old traditions. Now their wedding is based on their taste and their budget. With the motto being: “This is the last time, and it’s got to be the best.”
The “encore bride” is in a different place than when she had her first wedding. They are confident, they have more money to spend, and they know what they want. Their focus is on “simple elegance”.
Whether it is your first, second or third wedding the focal point is still the wedding dress. These brides are seeking dresses that are tailored rather than poufy – a sexy, sophisticated look with the emphasis on quality fabrics.
Today’s trends in bridal gowns are all about you. Your second wedding gown should reflect your personal style, your fashion sense and what kind of wedding you want to have.
When shopping for that perfect dress it helps to know your body type so you can choose the gown that highlights your best features and downplays the areas you wish you could forget.
Here are some of the latest fashion trends to help get you started:
Trains are fine, but keep them simple, again matching the formality and style of the wedding.
Show some skin: At this year’s runway shows, many designers decided to go bare. Creations featured mostly strapless gowns that place the emphasis on the bodice: gently weaved, beaded, or simple with demure jeweled straps.
Body-Conscious: Designers are very body conscious these days, with shape taking precedence. This is good news for any bride: most of these dresses have a slimming effect. The ever-popular A-line (also known as princess) is a long cut that draws the eye downwards, and often has a built-in train. This does not mean that designers have abandoned the classic traditional gowns…the skirts still float but the cut is meant to flatter the body.
Embroidery and Lace: These two mainstays of bridal fashion never go out of style and let’s not forget beading. Today’s bride wants the opulence in beadwork with many designers choosing crystals over glass beads.
Color: This component of a gown has never been so popular. Brides are actually thinking outside the box these days choosing jewel tone gowns in gold, silver, and a variety of pearl tones. However, second time brides still are confident enough to wear white, after all “white symbolizes commitment and faithfulness” so why not!
Where to Look: Magazines are the traditional way a bride begins her gown search, but why not look for a gown online? Most designers now have WebPages, and a collection of name gowns can be found on a number of websites. And if you’re wondering, “Will the gown of my dreams fit me right?” there’s help to be found on a multitude of websites which determine your body type and then suggest the dress type that is best for your figure.
Finally Hit the Runways! The latest fashions needn’t remain a trade secret. Bridal shows, which feature live runway presentations of the current trends and designers, are an excellent way to view a variety of gowns.
A wedding is a celebration of love so indulge and take your time finding that perfect gown. The number one comment I receive from second time brides is…”this is definitely it, I’m not getting married again”.
Gail Young is a co-founder of The Bridal Chalet, an online bridal boutique selling designer style couture and traditional wedding gowns and bridal accessories. A second time bride herself, Gail combines her extensive knowledge of the industry with her passion for designing couture bridal fashion. The Bridal Chalet has a collection of exclusive designer wedding gowns geared to the second time bride – the Sara Houston Collection.
Visit her website at: www.bridalchalet.com
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Your groomsmen will be donating their time to your big event. They will appear at the tailor or rental store to be fitted for that formal wear. They will hear your arguments with your beloved over the wedding arrangements. They will celebrate your last night of being a single man. They will cheerfully escort your guests to their seat. And some will offer toasts in your honor at your reception. So how do you show your appreciation for all they are doing for you? Take a look at some of our suggestions.
-A key chain with a four leaf clover embedded into a plastic circle.
-A monogrammed leather money clip with their initials on the front.
-Silver cuff links with their last initial engraved on the surface.
-For the man who travels, a monogrammed leather travel valet.
-For the ones who are still single, give a silver paperweight of a frog with a crown on his head.
-A set of silver pen and pencil set with their last initial as an emblem on the clip.
-A Silver-plated yo-yo with the words “thanks” and the date of your wedding engraved on the side.
-For the golfer in your group, a silver plated key chain with a golf divot tool attached.
-Someone in your group loves to BBQ. Give him an branding iron with his initials so that he can brand every steak that comes off his grill.
-For the hiker, give him a set of “off trail” binoculars.
-For the guys in the baseball team, give them a personalized bat. You can add 3 lines to the bat to express your appreciation.
Adriana Copaceanu provides people with creative gift ideas that don’t blow the bank. Gift Baskets for Baby, Birthday and Beyond, are just some gift ideas you’ll find at her site: http://www.abcgiftsandbaskets.com. Want regular reminders on gift-giving? Sign up for her free monthly newsletter at http://www.abcgiftsandbaskets.com/gift-news-signup.htm.
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Has timing always been an issue for you no matter what you try to do? Maybe you’re someone who can be creative, but you’re not sure when would be the perfect time to surprise your husband or wife. Timing can be crucial depending on the sort of romance you have in mind with your spouse. Sometimes you must plan romance while other times you have to always keep a watchful eye out for the right moment to present itself. You might think you are blind to those moments or you simply don’t have any instinct for timing, but here are a few ideas to get you started and hopefully find your own groove.
Guys, when you arrive at home with your wife, you can take this opportunity to ’sweep her off of her feet’- literally! Have you ever carried your wife over the threshold of your house? Well, it’s a gesture that never gets old. The timing can be tricky with this one, though. Don’t do it while either of you have a bag or bags in your hands or while she’s on her cell phone. While the women may feel that this is an appropriate action to take with their men, it most likely won’t work. If you feel you must give it a try, more power to you!
Create a home that is your romantic getaway location for both of you. Always keep a number of items that you can use in order to transform your home into a romantic hideaway. Keep a box filled with romantic scented candles, music, flowers and wine and keep some sensuous foods in the kitchen at all times. These can include strawberries, grapes, whipped cream and anything else that sparks your imagination.
When one spouse leaves a trail of clothes from the door all the way to the bedroom where they are waiting, it is always acceptable and a hit! You can also use a different version of this classic by leaving a trail of lit candles that lead to the bedroom. As always, the brightest burning flame should be that of the person waiting in the bedroom. Don’t be surprised if your spouse’s flame matches yours by the time he or she reaches the bedroom!
For romantic moments at the workplace, simply take the time at work to stop, call your spouse and tell them that you love them. Copy your face or a part of you body on the copy machine and send it to him or her with a funny or suggestive note. Send him or her flowers at the office or to the restaurant where he or she is having lunch. Mail him or her your contact information on a Rolodex card with a memo saying, “Love Source. Call when lonely or horny.”
Finally, make sure you check his or her schedule ahead of time before attempting this next move. Pack a pillow and a blanket in a picnic basket and go to his or her office during the lunch hour. Tell his or her secretary to hold all calls, lock the office door and turn off every source of outside communication. Make love on the desk. It will most likely be some of the best sex you both have had in a long time and could become a habit!
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Today’s marriages are on the rocks…there is need like never
before for women and men to renew their faith and look unto God
for the help to cherish and respect one another in marriage. The
Christian marriage should be full of life, hope, and peace. So
how do we reveal the Fruit of the Spirit in our marriages? I
mean, it’s one thing to talk about being loving and
longsuffering toward one another…but boy is it a whole
different ball game to actually walk the talk. I have found that
seeking God daily, staying in His word, and remaining close to
Him has proven to be an awesome solution. Understanding God’s
heart on a particular matter that may be bothering you and
seeing things from God’s perspective may make a huge difference
in the way you respond to a situation. I have found that in my
marriage, if I respond quickly and out of an immediate response
to my emotions, I oftentimes overreact. But if I wait just a
little while longer…no matter how upset I may be…I can talk
to God about it, and then I feel better. It’s only then that I
can respond in a manner that won’t be upsetting to everyone in
the house! Do your best to guard the treasure of love in the
institute of marriage that our Heavenly Father has granted you.
If you are single and desiring a mate, trust the Lord to grace
you the strength and desire to wait for His perfect will, and to
serve Him and make wise choices during your wait for a husband.
Overall, marriage is a beautiful institution in which God
connected man and woman and He shows us how to abide with each
other in love and peace. Marriage should be a reflection of the
fruit of His spirit. I encourage all married couples today to
reflect on your attitudes and conceptions of marriage, and to
especially reflect on how you are treating your spouse. Are you
seeing your spouse through the eyes of Christ? Do you have a
positive purpose and mission in your marriage? Are you treating
each other as friends and companions? Remember the scripture
that says “love overlooks a multitude of sins”. Are you able to
overlook each others’ faults and idiosyncrancies? Guard your
hearts’ in your marriage, and cherish what God has given you.
And DEFINITELY, don’t let the last time you show your spouse how
much you love him or her be on Valentine’s Day! Love ALL year
long. — Demetria Zinga is the founder and owner of
www.faith-media.com, a technology and consulting firm which
specializes in web design and hosting, graphics and print
designs, internet marketing, and e-training. She is also the
founder of www.christianladies.net, an interactive ezine, blog,
and podcast for Christian women.
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“My husband won’t show me his feelings.” We hear it over and over again from frustrated wives. And a husband who won’t share emotions can be an obstacle to a better marriage. Why?
True intimacy – the closeness that results when two people can honestly share deep feelings – is elusive when one partner can’t or won’t reveal who he truly is emotionally.
I believe that finding intimacy in a marriage is made more difficult because of the way boys are raised in most societies. We’re taught to never show pain or allow ourselves to be vulnerable. Feelings are for girls.
When I grew up, this was the accepted definition of what manliness was all about. You solved problems or played sports if you were a boy. Many men raised in this model have never known any other reality, and they take this attitude into their marriage.
The sad result too often is missed opportunities at happiness, embittered partners, even divorce. Sometimes after years of marriage, couples ask us, “What went wrong in our marriage?”
What I found out was a secret that has given me a great marriage and been a key to a successful life.
The secret is this: Emotions are a source of strength and power. And by being sensitive to what you’re feeling and being real with your spouse regarding your emotions in a positive way, you can set the stage for a wonderful, rewarding and fulfilling marriage.
Men who never tap into their feelings don’t realize that they could have more joy, spontaneity, laughter, and better sex in their marriage by following a simple prescription. But at some level, many are afraid of confronting feelings, especially negative ones, because they haven’t developed the skills to handle them appropriately.
When many couples have a fight, the usual response from both partners is defensiveness and mutual blame. The predictable outcome in the marriage is a downward spiral. Couples may shut down emotionally, intimacy is lost and the quality of the marriage suffers.
But a paradox in relationships is that moments of conflict hold the greatest potential for emotional intimacy. This can happen when the partners take responsibility for working on themselves rather than getting caught up in blaming the other.
Here are some guidelines that will help both partners to use their feelings to improve their marriage:
1. Realize that emotions can be a powerful ally in helping you get what you want in your marriage relationship. Be open to the possibility that feelings (even negative emotions) offer the potential and power to create a win-win situation for yourself and your spouse. Be aware that showing emotions appropriately can be a path to strength and success.
2. Notice what emotions you feel when you’re with your spouse. Don’t hold back in showing your spouse positive feelings like love, appreciation, and respect. But pay special attention when you’re upset or feeling angry. It’s been said that there are really only two basic emotions – love and fear.
If you’re feeling some negative emotion like anger, stop and take a deep breath. Deep down, you may have some fear that is being activated. Ask yourself: “What fear does this situation bring up for me?” Be willing to share those fears with your spouse, using “I” statements rather than “you.”
You might say something like: “When you made us late last night to the party my first reaction was to get mad at you. Then I realized I really felt embarrassed because I was afraid our friends would think I wasn’t reliable.”
Take responsibility for your emotions and adopt the attitude of “How can I use this experience to grow?”
3. Remember to be kind to your spouse, even while disagreeing. You can use compassion while gently voicing your concerns. Choose your words carefully. Never stomp on the vulnerable side that your spouse shows. And ask her (or him) to show you the same respect.
It’s important to learn to tolerate your emotional discomfort during an argument without lashing out at your spouse. It can take courage to maintain courtesy and respect for your spouse even in the midst of disagreement. But it’s well worth it.
Reaching for true intimacy requires opening up some part of yourself that is tender and easily hurt. That part is your innermost self – the sacred ground of the spirit. It is tender grass that an insensitive partner could easily trample on. Make sure you don’t step on your spouse’s feelings when she shares them with you.
4. Be willing to take responsibility for your side in a disagreement and apologize for your part. Above all, avoid blaming your spouse.
Even if you feel justified in criticizing your spouse, use moderation. Recognition from you that every disagreement has two sides and that you respect her right to have her own perception will go a long way toward ending a quarrel. This creates an opening for reconciliation.
Sharing feelings can be scary for men, because it goes against ingrained beliefs and habits about what it means to be male in this society. But in a relationship of compassion and trust, the sharing of deep emotions can create a marriage of profound intimacy that can only be described as a soul connection.
And this type of relationship has universal appeal. Because happiness is a currency that everyone wants.
Lee Hefner is the co-author of Keep Your Marriage: What to Do When Your Spouse Says “I don’t love you anymore!” This e-book is available at http://www.KeepYourMarriage.com. You can also sign up for the free Keep Your Marriage Internet Magazine to get weekly ideas and support to help you save your marriage.
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Both the centerpiece of your evening and the delicious dessert, your wedding cake is a significant element of your wedding reception. It should be eye-catching and fabulous. (tasty too!) I’ve narrowed the process of selecting your wedding cake into three easy steps. Follow these, and you will have the confection that suits your personal style and budget.
Step 1: Determine your Wedding Cake Style
As the focal point of your reception, your cake should represent the theme of your wedding and reflect your overall vision. Consider the style, shape, color and adornments. Browse and collect photographs of cakes that inspire you. Make a list of qualities you like and don’t like. View Elegala.com’s wedding cake gallery for inspiring ideas.
Make it Last
Don’t forget to consider the longevity of your cake when making your selection. It may look like a work of art, but it is still food, and certain types will hold up better in extreme climates. If you will be holding an summer outdoor reception, opt for fondant icing over buttercream. While buttercream is tasty, it doesn’t keep well in heat or humidity.
Step 2: Factor Cost
Cake cost is based per slice and is determined by how complex the overall design. The typical range is usually $2-$15 per slice. As a result, there are 2 easy ways to keep your cake within budget.
The first way is to choose a more simple design with minimal adornments. Fresh fruit and flowers are the cheapest, while handmade gumpaste or sugarpaste decorations are more expensive.
If you have your heart set on an intricate design you saw in a magazine, don’t worry that the associated cost will break your budget. You can always improvise a complex design. Most wedding cakes featured in magazines use fondant icing, which creates that sought-after smooth look. Fondant icing is more expensive than buttercream, so ask your cake designer to create a similar look using buttercream icing. Many brides can opt for a smaller, intricately designed cake to showcase at their wedding, while the site holds simple sheet cakes in the kitchen to serve to guests.
When determining the cost of your cake, don’t forget about additional costs such as shipping your confection. Some venues also charge a cake cutting fee of about $1.50-$3 per slice, which can significantly add to the cost of your cake.
Step 3: Choose your Baker
Before commencing your search for a cake designer, first determine whether or not your reception site allows an outside baker. If your reception site is the exclusive baker, sometimes the case with country clubs and hotels, you can skip this step – your work is done. If the site does allow an outside baker, pick a few local cake bakers and book appointments to view their portfolios. When meeting with potential bakers, consider look, taste and price. The one you choose should be able to create the beautiful masterpiece you desire at a price you can afford, and it should taste scrumptious as well. Ask to taste some samples to determine the talents of your baker.
For a complete guide to creating an elegant and memorable wedding celebration, visit http://www.elegala.com, your ultimate wedding planning resource.
Cori Locklin is editor-in-chief for http://www.elegala.com/ and Elegala Magazine. Elegala is a new wedding planning resource offering the most comprehensive portfolio of superior wedding reception sites and wedding services, along with planning tips, photo galleries and checklists to keep brides in-the-know on today’s wedding trends and styles.
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Some future grooms say early on, “Just tell me when to show up and what to wear and leave me alone” and he leaves the work of the wedding to the bride. This is not as typical now as it was in past years. More and more men are getting involved in and enjoying the process of planning their wedding. Some men still think that it is a “girl thing” and not a “guy thing.” Give me a break! A wedding is a “couple thing” and should have equal participation of both the bride and groom.
Approaching your wedding as a twosome can give you the best results in less time. It is also a fairly good predictor of how the marriage will be. It answers many questions that will be important to the marriage, questions such as:
Who makes the decisions? Are they joint decisions or does one of you always have to have his or her way? Is one of you always right? (This implies that the other is always wrong). Does one of you usually have to agree just to get beyond the impasse and get on with it? Is one of you “The Boss” and the other the “Bossed?” Does that work for you?
Are your management styles compatible? Does one of you micro-manage and one of you use a broad brush approach and does that work for you? Sometimes this is highly effective because the broad brusher generates the creative ideas and the micro-manager can work out the details. It takes both. On the other hand a broad brusher can drive the micro-manager crazy and vice versa.
Are you willing to yield to the expertise of the other? Can you divide up the workload evenly and not second guess each other, but trust that it will be done correctly and on time? What do you do when you have a huge disagreement? Do you have a plan to work things out, to negotiate until you find a common ground of agreement? Does one of you hold a grudge if the decision doesn’t always go your way?
How do you handle money? Is one of you “tight-fisted” with money and the other an impulse spender? Can you agree on an amount you can spend independently without consulting the other? What happens if one of you doesn’t abide by the agreed upon amount? How do you resolve the issue?
Do you have similar likes and dislikes? Do you find that you almost always pick the same thing, even though you aren’t together at the time? Do you, for example, generally like the same colors, music, style? If not, do you know and appreciate what the other one likes? Is it o.k. to like different things? If not, does one of you always have to capitulate or do you find ways to work out who gives in now and who gives in later?
If, as you get closer to the wedding date, you find that you are at each others throats and are playing the “blame game” or the “poor me, the martyr” scenario, it’s time to stop and take a good hard look at your relationship. Marriage is made up of multitudinous compromises by each of you. It requires give and take, yes and no, me and you in equal proportions. If the problem is a matter of exhaustion or the “jitters” that’s one thing. But if you simply cannot work together, take some time to think it over, even if it means postponing the wedding. Some pre-nuptial counseling may be of help before you proceed.
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